Those that know me well, know that I have been under some pretty extreme stress with some big issues facing our club. Our lease is up in oh...4 days...and we have no real place to go. This has been 10 straight months of challenges...a nightmare to be honest. Just thinking about it now is making me crazy! We think we can still negotiate to stay where we are for a while but with some crappy conditions...one of those being that our rent will go up and through the roof... and on top of that, we will be losing $48,000.00 a year in gaming revenue and so on...just crap on a plate!
Anyways, today was particularly stressful and all night I was flushed and I could feel my blood pressure and heart rate racing and being erratic. I felt off all day. When I got home tonight after our board meeting (more stress), DH and DD were having a bit of a disagreement and I just couldn't take it anymore...so I jokingly said something like...if I die of a heart attack or a stroke tonight you'll know why!!! Well...poor DD starts freaking out...bawling and shaking and sobbing....grabs me and throws her arms around me and is upset because she thinks I am going to die tonight.
Just at that point, little Taz escapes out the front door and all I can hear is a car driving by and DH screaming for Taz to come back...so I jump up and run out the door...of course DD follows and as she thinks Taz might die too, her panic escalates. Ack! Oh vey...just what my poor heart needs! OK...*I* should be the one having a panic attack..not my 10 year old. Ah...poor girlie...I feel bad. I remember having panic attacks at her age whenever I thought of death or my mom dying or something like that...so I understand...I've just never seen that from her before. That was a first.
Is stress catchy?
Anyways, Taz finally came back and Noah was ok...but boy am I ever drained.
Fried. Done. Finished. Ok. Time for bed.
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You know the old saying,'if mama ain't happy, then nobody's happy'? I truly find that my mood dictates the rest of the house. When I was in a lot of pain after my attack, the kids were really anxious and unnerved. Once I got medicated and could cope a bit better, they did too. I imagine it is the same for stress, happiness and of course, grief.
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